Though feminism has played an invaluable role in giving women the right to choose, there are still many obstacles to overcome. One of these is the decision to become a mother—and what deciding against it does for your reputation. While some readily accept this choice, many will not take any answer (especially “I just don’t want to”) as a satisfactory reason to deny motherhood.
Holly Brockwell, of London, has the following to say: As a woman, there are four little words I can say that invite more condescension than almost any others: “I don’t want children.” But why? people ask, as if there’s a simple answer to why you viscerally, instinctively reject something that’s considered a fundamental part of humanhood. Even in 2015, there is still a deep-rooted stigma surrounding women who do not want children. They are allowed to not want children, but only to a certain point. In a world riddled with over-population, this seems an absurd reaction to an individual choice. But even in telling my own mother that I don’t want children, she happily conceded, saying: “of course you don’t want children… yet.”
Despite the prevailing stigma, childless women are on the rise. In light of these recent findings, we caught up with UBCO students and alumni to ask them a couple of questions: “Do you see children in your future? Do you think this will affect your career path?”
Lauren Harrison – PPE major:
“I don’t see children in my future. I am passionate about my career path — although I want to be careful here, because I do not think it’s necessarily vital to pick one or the other — and for me, personally, I don’t see myself achieving the level of success I want for myself while bearing and raising a child or two. I’ve also never thought of myself as maternal; although I strive to be compassionate and empathetic, when I see a small child I sort of go into panic mode.”
Cherie MacDonald – English major:
“Absolutely no [to children]. I don’t want to be pregnant, I don’t want to nurse, and I don’t want to change diapers. Sure, there’s more to kids than that but I can only handle an hour or so of my niece before I’m desperate for my brother to take her back! I’m quite firm in this decision and my fiancé knows this and respects it.”
Kelsey Boyd – English major:
“I kind of hate this question because I think it perpetuates a false binary. I think woman can, and do, make having children and having a job work all the time. But, yeah, it’s silly that women are still expected to have children or something’s considered… off… about them. For me, I have no idea if I will want children. Right now, yes, but who knows in three years when I’m graduated?”
Kate Eggleston – visual arts major:
“I do see myself having children; however, when that will happen is still in the works for me. I feel that I still have a few years where there are so many things I want to do, and once I’ve completed those things, I feel the next step will be to become a mother. I want to be an artist, and I believe that can still be achievable even if I have children one day. The best course of action? If you want children, and you want a job wherein you are content, choose a situation where both can be easily accommodated. When you are ready to be a parent, you shouldn’t have to choose between one or the other.”